Some people are just nasty

June 19, 692


Egnatius is this guy i know and he is so gross. Lesbia agrees with me too. So I decided to write this about him. I think its pretty funny. And writing it totally helped me relax.

EGNATIVS, quod candidos habet dentes,
renidet usque quaque. si ad rei uentum est
subsellium, cum orator excitat fletum,
renidet ille; si ad pii rogum fili
lugetur, orba cum flet unicum mater,
renidet ille. quidquid est, ubicumque est,
quodcumque agit, renidet: hunc habet morbum,
neque elegantem, ut arbitror, neque urbanum.
quare monendum est te mihi, bone Egnati.
si urbanus esses aut Sabinus aut Tiburs
aut pinguis Vmber aut obesus Etruscus
aut Lanuuinus ater atque dentatus
aut Transpadanus, ut meos quoque attingam,
aut quilubet, qui puriter lauit dentes,
tamen renidere usque quaque te nollem:
nam risu inepto res ineptior nulla est.
nunc Celtiber es: Celtiberia in terra,
quod quisque minxit, hoc sibi solet mane
dentem atque russam defricare gingiuam,
ut quo iste uester expolitior dens est,
hoc te amplius bibisse praedicet loti.

Egnatius, because you have radient teeth, they shine to everyone. If the thing comes up to the bench, when the speaker stirs from weeping, those shine; if to mourn the blessed dead son on the funeral pyre, cry for the only mothers who are childless, those shine. Because of this, wherever is, drive however many, they shine: They have death, nor elegant, to judge, neither city wit. Remind me how you, good Egnatius. If the city is or Sabines or Tiber or the rich Vimber or the rich Etrsucans or Lanuuinus black and the teeth and beyond, that my likewise touch, or that it pleases, that you wash your teeth with pus 3 times a day, yet all the way that and be unwilling: for silly laughter is trifling thing not existing. Now the Celtiberae: The Celtiberae in the land, which will urinate, this they became accustomed to mourn the teeth and rub hard with red gum, that your teeth are, this you drink greatly before you wash and bathe.

See i told you guys. Lesbia and I are doing great but Im still unsure if it will really last. well time will tell
Catullus out...